Word of 2013, and Day #30 of the December Photo Project

You can struggle against what you hear being whispered into your ear, or you can accept it peacefully, even if you might wish you were hearing something else.

My Word for 2012, Trust, came easily. I was happy to welcome it. Looking back, if I'd known how hard Trust would prove to be, I might have been more reluctant. But it was a good year, an important Word for my life, and much good came from it. 

During these last few weeks I've had ideas of what my Word could be for 2013. And then, in the midst of my pleasant musings, a conversation began in my mind. It was something like a prayer, something like my conscience, and something like soul-talk with God.

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Which of these Words I've laid out should I choose? I want it to be full of power, full of meaning! It needs to be an area of growth, and an area where I can explore what God created me to be. A Word to help refine my character. A Word that will --

Grace.

No, not that. Too generalized. Not what I need to focus on. Booooooring.

Grace, Lyssa.

What? I don't want that. I've got grace down already. I want to choose something else, something that will really bring change!

You already know Grace fully?

Um... well... no. But there are lots of other things I'd rather know more! 

You need Grace.

Sigh. That's true. I probably need to learn how to GIVE Grace also. 

Everyone needs Grace.

Are you saying that Grace is related to love? 

And gentleness. And compassion. 

Ugh. I'm not so good at those things. I was trying to stay away from those. Can't I save Grace for another year, when I maybe won't have a toddler around, or when I've built up my skin a bit tougher to the world first?

Grace comes best when it is undeserved.

I knew you were going to say that. Grace probably means working on patience, too. Another thing I lack. 

Grace covers many things.

I thought choosing a Word was supposed to be simple. You're making this hard. Now if I don't choose Grace, I'll feel secretly guilty all year. 

Why do you run away from Grace?

Because it makes me uncomfortable! I'm not Graceful, or Gracious, or Grace-giving. I'm clumsy, foot-in-mouth, judgmental, stubborn, and... stubborn. Lots of stubbornness. 

Looks like Grace is more needed than you thought.

Hmmm.

Grace.

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Look out, 2013. Here Grace and I come. 

You can struggle against what you hear being whispered into your ear, or you can accept it peacefully. And even if you wish you were hearing something else, it might be exactly what you need. 

Meets Us Where We Are

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DPP, Day #29

Illness is no fun. Poor Harmony is just not her usual happy self. But sometimes fun times happen in the midst of sad sniffles and coughs and naps. Then mama can smile and grab her camera. In between sips of healing tea and running to blow my nose, of course. Bleh. 

Harmony's favorite toys right now are her wooden shapes that she can hold and knock together, a red wooden ball, and spoons/measuring cups. She's just getting to the stage where she likes knocking over towers that we build for her. 

We woke up this morning to a lovely dusting of snow, and I didn't get any pictures of that. Boo.

Hoping to feel better soon in time to welcome in the new year!

Playtime

Are they edible?

Hi, mama!

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DPP, Day #28

Trust. Who knew that so many challenges and blessings would be wrapped up in that tiny Word package?

Trust was my Word for 2012. And let me tell you... it permeated every area of my life.

I had to Trust that my students' families really meant it when they said they weren't quitting music lessons because of me. That I wasn't a terrible teacher, but the reason was their own busy schedule, their child's different interests, their teen's entry into high school.

I had to Trust that I would still be a good teacher even after I had to take off almost four months to adjust to life as a mother and recover from an awful illness.

I Trusted my body and intuition to have Harmony at home. No hospital, no OBGYN, no pain medications, no one present except Chris, my mom, and the midwife.

I Trusted my limits when I had to say "no" to people.

I had to Trust that even when I snapped at the ones I love the most they still cared about me.

I have to Trust that I'm doing what Chris and I feel is best for Harmony as we raise her, even when our parenting differs from friends and family around us.

I Trusted that even though I forgot to read my Bible, neglected my study time during hard weeks, fell asleep instead of praying, and worried more about what people thought than about what God thought... that God was still there. And He still knew me, loved me, and forgave.

That's what it really came down to: Trusting God.

As my dear friend Betty says, "do you Trust Him here? Do you Trust Him HERE?"

Every time I timidly answered, "Yes, Lord, I do trust you here. I believe. Please help my unbelief." Then another situation would arise where I'd have to learn more Trust.

The alternative is to Fear.

Plenty of that happened this year. The instant I stopped Trusting, Fear came creeping in, sometimes a tiny niggle of Fear, sometimes huge waves of I'm-drowning Fear, burying my rational thoughts and hindering everything I did. It was awful. But no matter how much I Feared, it didn't help anything. Worry only made things worse.

So Fear isn't just the opposite of Trust, it's what happens if I DON'T Trust.

Do I Trust God here?

Even when I don't feel in control of anything, or scary things happen, Fear doesn't have to be where I end up. I'd rather turn to Trust.

You've served me well, Word of 2012. Thank you, Lord, for bringing Trust into my life at a time when I really needed it. I'm even thankful for the hard times when I fell prey to Fear, because it showed me how much better is it when I Trust You.

Trust

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DPP, Day #27

A slow day of laundry, cleaning, playing with Harmony, and rest. That's about it.

Sometimes we just need a moment to step back and breathe, right? 

Starburst
Harmony's hand-made toy from grandma

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DPP, Day #26

While Christmas may be over, Harmony's excitement over her gifts is still new! You'll probably see more photos of her toys, because she loves them so much, and it makes me even more happy since they keep her occupied for longer than three seconds ; ) The bear in this picture is from Build-A-Bear, and was created for me and Harmony by my first lovely guitar teacher, Kelli, who has been in my life since I was eight years old. You can't see it here, but the bear has a flying guitar on its shirt, and if you squeeze its paw, it giggles!

Yesterday was my stepdad's birthday. We celebrated with him by playing board and card games, hanging out as a family, eating lots of leftovers from Christmas dinner, and having berry trifle. He's an awesome guy! So thankful he's in my life and Harmony's life as a wonderful grandpa.

Now it's time to CLEAN ALL THE THINGS that have been getting piled up for a week! We've spent most of our time at my folk's home, but now our own apartment needs some serious work. Hooray for a week and a half off of teaching!

Christmas Bear

Daddy and the Bug

Birthday Berry Trifle

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DPP, Day#25

Chris, being the thoughtful, sweet guy that he is, had my Christmas stocking all prepared for me first thing this morning, complete with a beautiful live rose at the top. I, being the extremely tired slacker, did not have his stocking ready at all. Fail. Too many late nights have taken their toll! But Chris once again forgave me and waited patiently for his stocking. Then we opened the gifts his family had sent us on our bed with Harmony. I have an awesome husband.

We spent the rest of the day with my family, opening gifts, playing games, singing carols, reading our advent book, talking with lovely friends on Chris's brand new iPad (a special gift from his folks; yay Facetime!), taking care of Harmony, cooking, and eating a delicious dinner of standing rib roast, au gratin potatoes, rolls, broccoli and cauliflower casserole, and bacon-wrapped green beans. Everyone was too stuffed for the berry trifle we'd planned as dessert!

Here is the recording we made of this year's favorite carol! I love how I awkwardly don't know what to do with my hands, and how Sean is posing like sasquatch at the end ; )  Enjoy our silliness! We had fun making the video.

Hope everyone had a merry Christmas!

Playing with New Toys

Favorite Stocking Stuffers

Joy to the World, the Savior Reigns

The Lord Has Come

Merry Christmas!

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DPP, Day #24

Today began with Chris at work early and Harmony a happy child as usual, while I groggily tried to wake up. We all had a lovely afternoon and evening with the rest of our family, preparing food for tomorrow, watching the Muppet's Christmas Carol, and opening our family gift: a board game called "Escape: The Curse of the Temple"! My family has always loved board games, especially Settlers of Catan, and other less well known ones such as Carcassan, Lost Cities, Pandemic, and Roll Through the Ages.

There are some really fun elements to this new game, like the ten minute limit, the CD soundtrack that times your game and adds intensity, the multiple levels of difficulty you can add (curses and treasures), and the fact that each player has to look out for the others, because if one person gets left behind, everyone loses the game.  Harmony watched us play from the comfort of her sling. It took us a little while to figure out how to play as a team! It is a very fast-paced, cooperative, fun game... unless everyone is shouting at once that they "need gold" : )

I'm playing mandolin with an acoustic guitarist and a violinist at a Christmas Eve service in a few hours. Our church doesn't have a service tonight, but I was invited to play at a different church, which is great! I'm excited to be getting back into mandolin. Hopefully there will be more of that in my near future!

Have a lovely Christmas Eve!

Games Together

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